Louise Chapman tells us the truth and lies behind online dating.Written by Louise Chapman on 12th July 2015
Confessions: Online Dating
“Oh my God, are you being serious?”“What the hell is someone like you doing that for?!” These are just two of the reactions I received from friends when I told them what I had done
“Oh my God, are you being serious?”“What the hell is someone like you doing that for?!”
These are just two of the reactions I received from friends when I told them what I had done. No, before you ask, I have not committed any kind of crime, nor become an online sexual sensation overnight...I have simply just signed up to a dating site.
You're probably categorising me as one of three descriptions: desperate, sad or 'has no social life'. In reality, I am none of the above; in fact, far from it.
I originally thought the only people who used dating sites were 40-year-old overweight perverts with nothing t offer, or, women who were suffering a mid-life crisis. Truth be told, the variety that you find is quite honestly unbelievable.
After discovering you could only reply to messages after paying on match. com, I abandoned the site and signed up three months ago to completelyfreedating.com. Signing up was easy. I made my profile, wrote about myself and added pictures I thought represented me well; natural day picture, out for dinner smiling and, finally, all dressed up out clubbing. Pictures I felt showed a) I am not afraid of the natural no makeup look and b) Yes I do in fact have a social life. I wrote about studying Spanish at university and my hobbies that include writing, swimming and going out. Oh and also, what I was hoping to find on the site. Which was a bit of fun, few dates and if it leads to a relationship then so be it!
I browsed the site while waiting for responses. Guys without pictures, I dismissed straight away. These are the 40 year old perverts everyone warns you about. However, there were far more males to view; overweight, skinny, muscly, married, seeking sex, single for years, come out of a relationship with baggage (aka children), but also, students like myself, fed up of meeting the same one- night-stand material falling out of a club.
Over the next few days, I had a variety of messages. From the normal “Hey, you look nice, how are you?” to the strange “If I were to ask you what you'd rather: Go on a glorious date with me, throw me off a cliff into a bay of starving sharks, cover me in cheese (like this opening gambit) What would your response be?”
Honestly? I could write a book about all the responses I have received! I am yet to go on a date, but I have got to know a few guys quite well over facebook/skype etc and a meeting is on the cards.
The point of this article is to say, if you are considering it, go for it! You are not sad and desperate, merely curious. My cousin met her boyfriend on a dating site; eight years later they are going strong and getting married next year. Anything is possible!
Written by Sarah Welsby